FFXIII remix
by The Urban ButtMonkey
Summary: what would have happened if sora, donald, and goofy showed up in the middle of final fantasy 13. read to find out my version of what happens


ok so i just wanted to write random stuff and suddenly i find myself playing kingdom hearts two and final fantasy XIII at the same time. (dont ask how i pulled that off but it took alot of talent a beer and a monster to do it) and i have a light bulb moment. what would happen if i combined two of the most epic story lines in video game history into a new story. i never played final fantasy before and i got 13 to see if it was good and... it was "orgasmic" ill put a dictionary at the end of the story for my retard definitions. there will be a few of them. this first part will sort of show how sora donald and goofy end up on pulse and such. i know i suck at writing but i will evolve as i go into the story. (hints longer chapters and such.) ok so ill stop rambling on and start. *deep breath and starts the brain.* man its dusty in here* oh FYI this story starts a little ways after lightning obtains the odin summon just to clear up that.

sora, donald , and goofy had been floating in the cosmos for days. the gummi ship had been damaged and now they were stuck in the middle of know where. "garwsh i wonder if we'll ever be rescued?" goofy ask. "awwwwwww forget it." donald said as he turned off the radar. "come on guys we cant give up that easy." sora said. the ship suddenly lurched and started to rotate. " what the hell?" donald yelled. all three looked out the window and saw that the ship was heaed for a large planet. "we're going to die!" donald wailed. "oh shut up you stupid duck!" sora yelled at donald as he grabed the controls and pulled up. the clouds prevented sora from seeing anything outside. the ship hit something and barrel rolled. sora steadied the ship as they came out of the clouds. before he could react the gummi ship plowed into a mountain side. it slowly began to roll down tumble after tumble until it finally came to rest at the base of the mountain.

sazh looked on in confusion as the strange aircraft tumbled down the mountain. "never seen a psicom ship like that before." he said. "whats that old man?" vanille ask. "that ship couldn't have been psicom." sahz said as he took off torwards the crash sight.

hope had also seen the crash. "hey ummm light did you see that aircraft?" hope ask lightning. "yes." she awnsered. "and i think we may want to check it out because it definetly wasn't psicom." "ok then lets go!" hope said and took off. "kids," lightning said "never can slow down to think"

"owwwwwwwwwwww my head." goofy said. h?#$m!, G?$#^&!... "huh?" goofy said as he looked down. "ohhhhhhhhh sora! he yelled as he got off of sora's head. "why is it thay you always end up on my head?" sora yelled. " oh stow it you bunch of palookas!" donald yelled from under a seat. "where the hell are we?" sora ask as he walked out of the destroyed gummi ship. "freeze!" a voice yelled. soras hands shot up. donald clapped his hand over his face and goofy looked confuzed. five psicom soldiers had guns pointed at them. "use the keyblade you idiot!" donald yelled as he zaped one of the soldiers. sora summoned the keyblade and instantly took two soldiers down. goofy tossed his sheild and finished the last two off. "not bad at all." a voice said. the three turned around ready for more action. " hey now we arn't here to fight you guys." a tall black guy with an afro said. " oh sorry. " sora said. " dont sweat it a girl about his age said. "well im sazh and this is vanille." sazh finally said. "oh ummmmmm im sora and this is donald and goofy." sora said as he shook sazh's hand. "i saw you could do magic so you must be a l'cie." vanille said as wile she examined for marks. " a la whaaaa?" sora said looking confuzed. "you dont know what a l'cie is?" sazh ask. "nope." the three replied at once. "fancy seeing you two here." a voice echoed. "lightning hope your ok!" vanille yelled. " what did you expect, it is us your talking about." hope said. " cocky are we?" sazh said smiling." whats that mean?" lightning said giving sazh a cross look. "ummmmmmm i think we should leave you guys alone." sora said taking a step back. "your going know where!" lighning hissed. "hey now you cant make me do anything." sora said readying himself for battle. " who are you?" hope ask. "we're sora donald and goofy who the hell are you." sora ask as he held the keyblade ever tighter. "im hope and this is lightning." hope said wile he slowly reached for is wepon. "ok so now that we all know each other these three are friendly and you two stuck up asses need to snap out of it and get with the program here." sazh said looking very annoyed. "we'll see who's friendly." lightning said as she began to walk torwards the path. "just between us... i always thought she was a bitch," sazh said to sora donald and goofy. "but she's good at battle." the rst of the "group" followed lightning off torwards where ever she was going.

snow sat in his cell thinking very hard. how had he been captured? he shook the thought from his mind and turned his focus to finding a way out to save serah. he would have to fight fang and cid and countless soldiers to get out but... serah was worth it. he got up and examined the door closely. it seemed to have an electronic lock on it. he pulled off a panel and started sifting through wires until he found the ones he was looking for. he said a silent prayer and severed the wires. the door beeped and he knew it worked. " come on lady luck let all the soldiers be on the other side of the ship." he said to forced the door open and ran into an empty hallway. he evaded multiple soldiers and found a computer terminal left unattended and still logged into the ships system. he mashed buttons here and there and finally found serah. fang and cid had her under their personal protection. he turned around and faced a gaurds gun. he quickly grabed the gun, snapped it, and disspatched the gaurd. he intended to get serah and kill anyone in his way or... die trying. he rounded a cornerand slowed to a creeping pace. he crept up and snapped the neck of a decent sized guard. he grabbed the sword off the guard and stowed it in his jacket incase of emergency. serah was just around the corner. as snow rounded the last corner he was kicked square in the face. fand had been waiting for him. give me sarah!" he yelled and carged at her. " oh that wouldnt be much fun would it?" she ask wile she stepped aside. snow hit the wall and recived another well placed kick to the spine. he collapsed but quickly got back up and went after fang again. this time he focused and hit fand full force in the face. she went flying through a door. snow went for another hit but stopped dead in his tracks. cid had a gun pointed at serah. "didn't your mother ever tell you it isnt polite to hit girls?" cid asked mockingly. snow stood frozen eyes fixed on the trigger. his trance like state allowed fang to kick him again in his gut. snow hit the floor and not two seconds later was kicked again. he flew and hit the wall. "enough!" cid said to fang. "i think pretty boy here has learned his place." snow looked up and tried to focus on serah but collapsed to the ground and blacked out.

lightning pressed on not really knowing where she was going. she was lost in her thoughts. why had she not listened to serah? she couldnt seem to think why. she half glanced over her shoulder at the rest of the group. they were all following her. they expected her to lead them. then a thought hit her. she was going to go to Palumpolum. she didnt know why but, it seemed the practical way to go since most places had been abandoned and the party was short supplied. out of the corner of her eye she saw hope. the kid hadnt given up yet. he was intent on getting revenge on snow but, it really wasnt snow that had killed his mother it was the sanctum. her head was swimming. she was thinking of too many things at once. she needed a break. just one hour away from it all would make her feel so much better. she shook her head. there wasn't a place left where she could get away. between the sanctum psicom and everything else... wow she thought. suddenly the world felt very very small. she walked on and on deep in thought.


End file.
